Vision Quest 2022
A vision quest isn’t just a journey of a young Native American boy entering manhood.
It’s a journey that’s available to each one of us.
I did some reading about the idea behind a vision quest, and it is described as a rite of passage that encourages and supports the awakening of your own indigenous wisdom.
It’s a period of spiritual seeking.
And it is often composed of these three elements: Solitude. Nature. Fasting.
I realized as I reflected on our last two weeks, that all of those components have been present. Larry and I intentionally took times of solitude. We spent the entirety of our trip immersed in Nature. And when I pondered on the fasting element, I discovered that I fasted from productivity. I did not nourish my ego on what I got done, or who needed me. I existed in nature. Period.
My perimeters starting crumbing in Oklahoma. I felt it. I didn’t know exactly what was happening. Only that the version of me that I knew was experiencing a death cycle, to make way for an expanding version of myself. We listened to a podcast with Brene Brown and Father Richard Rohr and he talked so graciously about our true nature of loving. In this world so full of unloving. He said, “to love deeply is to suffer deeply.”
He’s right. Have you noticed that our society doesn’t allow us to just love everyone equally? How they shove the sides in your face constantly and demand that you choose? And to choose one side is to be angry at the other. It hurts me. My heart and my being suffer with such a harsh approach to our human experience.
What does it mean to hold onto myself in this world at war with itself? How do I choose love even when the world I love is angry at me for not choosing enemies?
Today, my soul led me, (us) to John Denver’s Sanctuary. And instantly I knew this was the perfect and appointed culmination to this vision quest. To be free to join in with this magnificent earth. To sing with the brooks. To sway with the birches. To lay in the grass and feel the heart beat of Mother Earth. To accept that all of life is a song. I am a song. To commune with the Great Mystery. And worship.
This is how I will keep loving a world that may not choose to love me back. Maybe they can’t. It’s hard. This living. And the only truly meaningful response to all of the confusion and turmoil is mercy.
Thank you so much to each of you who have followed this part of my (and Larry’s) journey. Truly it was a great joy and a lovely gift to share with you the wonder of it all. We are all connected. We are all family. Here on this magnificent earth. And I’m grateful for you. That our paths have crossed somewhere along the way.
I believe we all want to be undone. We all want to be amazed and brought to an abrupt halt to look at something that leaves us speechless. We crave wonder. We desire meaning. And purpose.
I have been enchanted by the richness of rivers. I have been ministered to by the desert. I have been silenced by the majestic mountains and been stirred to discomfort by the vastness of the canyons. We have collected sunsets and attended sunrises.
In every landscape I encountered different reflections of myself. I unearthed fears. I felt the satisfaction of cresting a summit. And I experienced a life altering humility. At how small I really am in an expansive and diverse world.
If you have been moved in any way towards wonder. If you have felt even the smallest twinge of inspiration. If you have pondered even a tiny something that rose up in you, from following this quest, then I am delighted.
For every bit of this gift, I give deep thanks.
Namaste.
*Photo Credit: Larry E. Weaver
